Friday, October 15, 2010

Grandma's Hands



Grandma, some ninety plus years,
sat feebly on the patio bench.
She didn't move,
just sat with her head down staring at her hands.


When I sat down beside her
she didn't acknowledge my presence
and the longer I sat I wondered if she was OK
.


Finally,
not really wanting to disturb her
but wanting to check on her at the same time,
I asked her if she was OK.

She raised her head and looked at me and smiled.
"Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking,"
she said in a clear voice strong.



"I didn't mean to disturb you, Grandma,
but you were just sitting here staring at your hands
and I wanted to make sure you were OK,"
I explained to her.



"Have you ever looked at your hands," she asked..
"I mean really looked at your hands?"


I slowly opened my hands and stared down at them. I turned them over, palms up and then palms down. No, I guess I had never really looked at my hands as I tried to figure out the point she was making.


Grandma
smiled and related this story:


"Stop and think for a moment about the hands you have, how they have served you well throughout your years. These hands, though wrinkled shriveled and weak have been the tools I have used all my life to reach out and grab and embrace life.

"They braced and caught my fall when as a toddler I crashed upon the floor.

They put food in my mouth and clothes on my back. As a child, my mother taught me to fold them in prayer. They tied my shoes and pulled on my boots. They held my husband and wiped my tears when he went off to war.

"They have been dirty, scraped and raw, swollen and bent. They were uneasy and clumsy when I tried to hold my newborn son. Decorated with my wedding band they showed the world that I was married and loved someone special.

They wrote my letters to him and trembled and shook when I buried my parents and spouse.

"They have held my children and grandchildren, consoled neighbors, and shook in fists of anger when I didn't understand.

They have covered my face, combed my hair, and washed and cleansed the rest of my body. They have been sticky and wet, bent and broken, dried and raw. And to this day when not much of anything else of me works real well these hands hold me up, lay me down, and again continue to fold in prayer.

"These hands are the mark of where I've been and the ruggedness of life. But more importantly it will be these hands that God will reach out and take when he leads me home. And with my hands He will lift me to His side and there I will use these hands to touch the face of Christ."

I will never look at my hands the same again. But I remember God reached out and took my Grandma's hands and led her home.

When my hands are hurt or sore or when I stroke the face of my children and husband I think of Grandma.
I know she has been stroked
and caressed
and held by the hands of God.


I, too, want to touch the face of God
and feel His hands upon my face.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

man-boy don't need instructions?

Me: J9, you doing okay in the shower.

J9: Yep.

Me: You almost done.

J9: Nope,
it took me like five minutes
just to figure out the shampoo* today.


[*new bottle of shampoo in the shower]


...pause



Me: Everything okay?

J9: Yep, just still have to wash my body.




Me: What happened?


J9:
"It took so long just to figure out the shampooing today
I read the back of the bottle
and it said:

Wet hair.
Wash thoroughly.
Rinse thoroughly .
Repeat.

I decided not to use that one.
I didn't want to mess it up.

Too many directions."






I am trying to decide
if he could have
shampooed
just fine with that
Shampoo
if he had not
read the
instructions!!?

He is of the guy gender after all!

Thursday, June 10, 2010

God's Cake


Sometimes we wonder,
'What did I do to deserve this?'
or
'Why did God have to do this to me?'
Here is a wonderful explanation!
A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.
Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, 'Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.'
'Here, have some cooking oil,' her Mother offers.
'Yuck' says her daughter.
'How about a couple raw eggs?'
'Gross, Mom!'
'Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?'
'Mom, those are all yucky!'
To which the mother replies:
'Yes , all those things seem bad all by themselves.
But when they are put together in the right way,
they make a wonderfully delicious cake!
God works the same way.
Many times we wonder why
He would let us go through such bad and difficult times.
But God knows that when
He puts these things all in His order,
they always work for good!
We just have to trust Him
and eventually,
they will all make something wonderful!
God is crazy about you.
He sends you flowers every spring
and a sunrise every morning.
Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen.
He can live anywhere in the universe,
and He chose your heart.

Monday, May 17, 2010

i am NOT a morning person


i am not a morning person*.

*unless i am fishing
or have a camera
and
a perfectly painted sky

first to admit that i am a lousy cranky mess most mornings.

even the word morning...sounds like mourning....therefore it is grief to me. i have to wake up on my own, or at least be allowed to believe that i woke up on my own, even if such waking was nudged a little by someone poking me until i began to stir. at that point....let me be to stretch, yawn, and awaken. then i am bliss. i don't mind the sun shining in.



[heaven forbid i wake up to darkness,
that might warrant
wearing a caution sign
around my neck!]


this morning Mr. B cheerfully brings me prune juice. 6:30 am and he feels it necessary to be the bearer of bad fruit.



Seriously. so i am up.


...and i react. i make the bed, angerly.




i head into the bathroom and brush my teeth....which mistake i will pay for later....drinking prune juice is bad enough, drinking it with morning breath is better than a fresh palate expecting something delectable.

prune juice is NOT delectable.

and so I am grumpy,




and i have spent the morning pouting and reacting.
choosing an attitude
that
perpetuates
only
my own misery.


could i have just thanked him?

could i have just fallen back to slumber after smiling peacefully up at my best friend and BEST advocate for my health?



i mean really,
he was just doing what he feels is
best for my healing and my health.



he loves me....loves me not is NOT an option.


really....so now I regret.

i got up.

i asked him in about 12 different ways why he was so bent on me being awake.

did he need something?
did he just want me to stay in the habit of waking early?

was he upset that i was still lounging while he was making the lunches?



is my healing taking to long....?


finally he just looked at me,
took the glass of prune juice and drank it himself.




he wasn't trying to torture me.
he was just trying to be nice.




to make sure i had something beside my bed
when i woke up
something healthy
because he loves me
and for some weird reason
he wants to wake up next to me
for many many more mornings




mornings.....i may hate them....
but i hate WORSE
the thought of him waking up without me,
or me without him.

and so i poured myself another glass of prune juice,
drank it
and hugged him,
before heading back to bed.


GOOD morning????
yep, i suppose it was.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

sUndAy smilEs



Me: Hey Cece, have you been practicing your piano?
Cece: Yep, everyday,


on my ipod touch!


Me: ummmm....seriously???


Cece: Yeah,
I downloaded an app for that!

Wanna hear...?
seems there are new ways of doing
everything these days...
i wish i had an app for laundry....

on marriage

'Will you, um, marry me?' I haven't seen you in weeks! You don't look happy or excited about the prospect of our marriage! You're asking me to give up my - my freedom, my joie de vivre for an institution that fails as often as it succeeds? And why should I marry you anyway? I mean, why do you wanna marry me? Besides some bourgeois desire to fulfill an ideal that society embeds in us from an early age to promote a consumer capitalist agenda?
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