Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Life Drain
As soon as I read this discussion in my Marriage and Family course today I felt like I could write a novel about the subject.
The question is regarding work and role overload and asks how a family manages to balance all they are responsible for without losing sight of what is most important to them.
It also asked how a woman can carry a full-time job, while going back to school, in a relationship and motherhood, ...SUCCESSFULLY???
Ironically I have been asking myself this very question....not in such an eloquently rhetorical expression.
My simple question is
However the question is posed....here is my summation:
We are in serious work/school/raising kids overload right now.
Our kids are 15, 13, 10, and 8 years old. My husband has a job that keeps him from 8 am until 8 pm everyday. He is committed to time with me and the family as much as he can possibly give.
One solution for his demanding schedule is that we have a date every Wednesday evening. The kids actually spend the night at their Aunts house. She did not have children of her own and so it is a blessing on both sides. The kids look forward to it, and we enjoy the time together.
My husband is also home in the mornings for breakfast and for getting the kids off to school; he does the bedtime routine of stories, brushing teeth, prayers, and tucking the kids in at night.
We have had to do a lot of balancing to get to this point.
During the summers he comes home for lunch, and we have discussed having him take a late lunch during the school year so that he can have dinner with us.
Every Monday Night we have Family Night, something our church promotes, and so on that night he makes every effort to get home EARLY.
I think that we have to keep in mind that what works today is not what will work tomorrow, and it is certainly not how we have always done things.
We have to be flexible, communicate A LOT, and deal with the circumstances and changes that come with our kids growing ages and stages.
We both have community and church responsibilities as well. We have to work together to be sure that someone is always with the children and that they are not being put on the back burner for our other interests.
The significant thing is that our sight is set to our children, our family and the needs there being met with priority. The children and our relationship are the most important parts of this.
We have to consider every persons needs; gratitude, compassion, consideration and communication are key.
My full-time job is being a Mother and Wife, I am in school three-quarter time and have been for 4 years now. My answer to the question regarding how a woman can maintain her relationship is locked up in all that I have already said. Communication and time together is priority. You definitely have to be creative in making things work and remember what is most important.
This may be my last semester for a while, sadly, yet it is what is necessary. It is about me being flexible, recognizing what is in the best interest of my children, my family, my relationship, and good health.
Our childrens' ages are requiring a great deal more and with my husbands hours I am solely responsible for their afterschool/homework/social/emotional needs. They need more of me now than they used to, and there is a great deal more to their needs.
As a family we have communicated, and have come up with the best interest for them and for us. It doesn't feel like quitting, just a breather so that they have the best childhood that we can give them.
Whenever we have found ourselves in conflict we take the time to communicate and to brain storm together until we come up with what we feel is best for our family as a whole. This course has helped me make the decision because I realize how crucial this period of their childhood is.
Our family relationships depend on making decisions that are in the best interest of us as a whole unit.
My summary: Communicate, compassion, family time, conflict solving, ...SUCCESS.
I see that there is a great deal of work and role overload just managing the lives of our children and balance with our relationship as a couple.
I did not know it would ever be quite like this but we are committed to doing our best for them and for each other. The pendulum swings both directions:
however difficult that some days can be,
Work together, be committed, work hard, be loving, work willingly, and it will work!
The question is regarding work and role overload and asks how a family manages to balance all they are responsible for without losing sight of what is most important to them.
It also asked how a woman can carry a full-time job, while going back to school, in a relationship and motherhood, ...SUCCESSFULLY???
[sounds familiar....with hope for success]
Ironically I have been asking myself this very question....not in such an eloquently rhetorical expression.
My simple question is
how to remain human while raising them.
However the question is posed....here is my summation:
We are in serious work/school/raising kids overload right now.
Our kids are 15, 13, 10, and 8 years old. My husband has a job that keeps him from 8 am until 8 pm everyday. He is committed to time with me and the family as much as he can possibly give.
One solution for his demanding schedule is that we have a date every Wednesday evening. The kids actually spend the night at their Aunts house. She did not have children of her own and so it is a blessing on both sides. The kids look forward to it, and we enjoy the time together.
My husband is also home in the mornings for breakfast and for getting the kids off to school; he does the bedtime routine of stories, brushing teeth, prayers, and tucking the kids in at night.
We have had to do a lot of balancing to get to this point.
During the summers he comes home for lunch, and we have discussed having him take a late lunch during the school year so that he can have dinner with us.
Every Monday Night we have Family Night, something our church promotes, and so on that night he makes every effort to get home EARLY.
I think that we have to keep in mind that what works today is not what will work tomorrow, and it is certainly not how we have always done things.
We have to be flexible, communicate A LOT, and deal with the circumstances and changes that come with our kids growing ages and stages.
We both have community and church responsibilities as well. We have to work together to be sure that someone is always with the children and that they are not being put on the back burner for our other interests.
The significant thing is that our sight is set to our children, our family and the needs there being met with priority. The children and our relationship are the most important parts of this.
We have to consider every persons needs; gratitude, compassion, consideration and communication are key.
My full-time job is being a Mother and Wife, I am in school three-quarter time and have been for 4 years now. My answer to the question regarding how a woman can maintain her relationship is locked up in all that I have already said. Communication and time together is priority. You definitely have to be creative in making things work and remember what is most important.
This may be my last semester for a while, sadly, yet it is what is necessary. It is about me being flexible, recognizing what is in the best interest of my children, my family, my relationship, and good health.
Our childrens' ages are requiring a great deal more and with my husbands hours I am solely responsible for their afterschool/homework/social/emotional needs. They need more of me now than they used to, and there is a great deal more to their needs.
As a family we have communicated, and have come up with the best interest for them and for us. It doesn't feel like quitting, just a breather so that they have the best childhood that we can give them.
Whenever we have found ourselves in conflict we take the time to communicate and to brain storm together until we come up with what we feel is best for our family as a whole. This course has helped me make the decision because I realize how crucial this period of their childhood is.
Our family relationships depend on making decisions that are in the best interest of us as a whole unit.
My summary: Communicate, compassion, family time, conflict solving, ...SUCCESS.
I see that there is a great deal of work and role overload just managing the lives of our children and balance with our relationship as a couple.
I did not know it would ever be quite like this but we are committed to doing our best for them and for each other. The pendulum swings both directions:
however difficult that some days can be,
the blessings
and the good times
are full reward.
and the good times
are full reward.
Work together, be committed, work hard, be loving, work willingly, and it will work!
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
wAy bAck WHEN---esdAy ♥
Pre-"I want a mullet" days...
Way back when they were little ---er!
When I see pictures
like these it reminds me
to cherish the moments
that we have now,
for soon enough today
will too be WAY BACK WHEN....
...when they were little ---er ♥
WHAT'S IN A MULLET?
REMEMBER THIS? [posted previously 11/29/08]
what to do?
Our youngest wants to grow all the back of his hair and keep the front short.
what to do?
Our youngest wants to grow all the back of his hair and keep the front short.
SOUNDS LIKE A MULLET.
he already has the vest to go with the look; SCARY!!!
VOTE:
yes, we allow him to be creative
maybe, might be good to get it out of his system now
no, ABSOLUTELY a bad idea.
he already has the vest to go with the look; SCARY!!!
VOTE:
yes, we allow him to be creative
maybe, might be good to get it out of his system now
no, ABSOLUTELY a bad idea.
the emphasis on the no part is in no way to dissuade you from your opinion.
He, too, has been taking votes,
and so far the mullet is winning. (HELP!)
He, too, has been taking votes,
and so far the mullet is winning. (HELP!)
we could always get him the wig ☺
Mr. B brings him in: Mom, check out the new cut.
Me: I can see who won that debate.
Mr. B: I think he looks good.
little Lad: Yeah, well Olivia C. wont think so.
She told me she wanted me
to grow my hair out.
[Now we know the method behind the madness,
always a girl involved.]
Mr. B: You look good buddy.
Son: THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK!
(as he runs to his room,
at least he hasn't learned
to slam the doors, YET.)
Me to Mr. B: You should have just let him get the mullet.
(even i can't believe that i heard myself say that.)
Father to Son: You look cute buddy.
It's a great haircut.
It is just like mine.
[me thinking: GOOD POINT]
OUCH!
Dad to Son: It will grow out.
Son: Not in one day.
AND now my neck is going to be cold.
(thanks to my sister,
for the Mullet fisherman info.
we now have fact behind the folly.)
Dad: Sorry buddy.
Son: Tell that to Olivia C.
yeah, dad, and we will C if he
will EVER go with you to get a hair cut again!
Sorry everyone who voted yea;
we are months away from the mullet now.
I guess that's not a bad thing, right?
him: So Dad made him get his haircut.
me: Yes, not real happy about it.
him: Yeah, I heard.
me: Dad should have let him have the mullet.
him: I don't know about that.
me: What's the harm in him having a mullet?
him: Having to look at him!
ouch! point for daD
Mr. B and the young Lad come home,
he is shaved, perfect future missionary haircut,
except that he is 7,
and has 11 more years to have hair
before the days of balded bliss.
he is shaved, perfect future missionary haircut,
except that he is 7,
and has 11 more years to have hair
before the days of balded bliss.
Mr. B brings him in: Mom, check out the new cut.
Me: I can see who won that debate.
Mr. B: I think he looks good.
little Lad: Yeah, well Olivia C. wont think so.
She told me she wanted me
to grow my hair out.
[Now we know the method behind the madness,
always a girl involved.]
Mr. B: You look good buddy.
Son: THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK!
(as he runs to his room,
at least he hasn't learned
to slam the doors, YET.)
Me to Mr. B: You should have just let him get the mullet.
(even i can't believe that i heard myself say that.)
Mr. B now is desperate to heal the broken heart of his child.
Who wouldn't want to?
Who wouldn't want to?
Father to Son: You look cute buddy.
It's a great haircut.
It is just like mine.
Son to Father:
That's because you
don't have any hair,
you have to cut your hair that way.
That's because you
don't have any hair,
you have to cut your hair that way.
[me thinking: GOOD POINT]
OUCH!
Dad to Son: It will grow out.
Son: Not in one day.
AND now my neck is going to be cold.
(thanks to my sister,
for the Mullet fisherman info.
we now have fact behind the folly.)
Dad: Sorry buddy.
Son: Tell that to Olivia C.
yeah, dad, and we will C if he
will EVER go with you to get a hair cut again!
Dad: We can always go get you the wig!
Sister: He will thank you guys someday
for not letting him do that. ☺
Sister: He will thank you guys someday
for not letting him do that. ☺
Sorry everyone who voted yea;
we are months away from the mullet now.
And the boy's love life is on hold.
I guess that's not a bad thing, right?
PS: Quick addition....
Conversation in the car
with our 15 year old; after the fact!
Conversation in the car
with our 15 year old; after the fact!
him: So Dad made him get his haircut.
me: Yes, not real happy about it.
him: Yeah, I heard.
me: Dad should have let him have the mullet.
him: I don't know about that.
me: What's the harm in him having a mullet?
him: Having to look at him!
ouch! point for daD
WHICH BRINGS US TO TODAY - NOVEMBER 17, 2009!!!
A few more haircuts later Mr. B has finally come to his senses....sort of.
He told our son after the last cut that he could decide WHEN he gets his hair cut again.
That LAST haircut was about 6 months ago.
Finally Mr. B told him that he would have to start wearing barrettes to keep his bangs out of his eyes!
son's response: That's no problem Dad, can we go buy some today?
Had my daughter not taken the camera for Art Class today I would have downloaded the pictures of my boy proudly wearing a barrette.
I know I know...you want to see it to believe it. But YES, he is fashioned in a clip and proudly headed off to third grade.
Stay tuned for WORDLESS WEDNESDAY.....starring the kid wearing a barrette!
A few more haircuts later Mr. B has finally come to his senses....sort of.
He told our son after the last cut that he could decide WHEN he gets his hair cut again.
That LAST haircut was about 6 months ago.
Finally Mr. B told him that he would have to start wearing barrettes to keep his bangs out of his eyes!
son's response: That's no problem Dad, can we go buy some today?
Had my daughter not taken the camera for Art Class today I would have downloaded the pictures of my boy proudly wearing a barrette.
I know I know...you want to see it to believe it. But YES, he is fashioned in a clip and proudly headed off to third grade.
Stay tuned for WORDLESS WEDNESDAY.....starring the kid wearing a barrette!
Friday, November 13, 2009
Wonderful Word
Exert your talents,
and distinguish yourself,
and don't think of retiring from the world,
until the world will be sorry that you retire.
and distinguish yourself,
and don't think of retiring from the world,
until the world will be sorry that you retire.
---Samuel Johnson
Happy Friday the 13th Everyone ♥
fLaSHbaCk FrIDay
So thankful that Glen returned home from Iraq safely. I was pondering the service to our country that is so selflessly rendered and remembered sitting for nearly two-thirds of a day waiting for our family friend Glen to leave for Iraq. Every moment counted, and as weary as the day became it was worth every second being there. The many tears that flowed, families sending their loved ones into harms way, yet the feeling of love for country and for honor was far greater than the sorrows.
We saw him off that day, and were thrilled to welcome him home two years later. It was hard to believe that he was going to be gone that long, and as the time passed we found ourselves in constant prayer for his safe return. He was one of the lucky ones. He came home....alive.
As we honored veterans this week my heart was full of appreciation for all who serve their countries. Our world is so uncertain, and I am thankful for Men and Women who will stand on the front lines so that we can peacefully raise our children in this country, out of harms way.
I think we don't recognize as much as we should how blessed we are to be able to walk out our front doors every morning to freedom, to peace, to a life that we are spoiled to enjoy.
This Friday the 13th.....keep a prayer in your heart for the families of those serving, keep a prayer for the service men and women, the leaders of our nations, and ask God to help us to be on His side, that all may someday enjoy the peace that we take for granted.
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