Saturday, May 15, 2010

Hospital Humor starring Mr. B



Me: Could you take one more???[copies of my hospital handcuff,
for lab stickers,
they took SIX,
an EVEN number,
i just wanted the lab tech
to make it SEVEN for LUCK!!!]


Lab tech: seriously???




Mr. B: Oh, she is serious.
LT: okay???

Mr. B to Lt: [aka small talk giant]
You married?

LT: yeah

mR. b: good luck with that.
we are going on near 20 years...

Me: ...of BLISS!

Mr. B: [choking] yeah,
BLISS???

When we were getting married,
I called Stacie to tell her our Phone Number,
OUR FIRST PHONE NUMBER!!!

So excited, days from our wedding...
I tell her: 582-4119

and SHE on the other line says:
"Can you get it changed???

I prefer odd numbers,
specifically
one with more
3's and 7's?"
the silence spoke chapters.

She was serious.

The phone lady
asked me if I was already married to THIS girl.
I had time to back out, she warned.

I married her anyway and it has been
well.....we are still married!

Dont worry,
I always get the LAST LAUGH!

While I was in the operating room
Mr. B sat patiently in the waiting room.
He is always good for a laugh,
no matter the circumstances.
I am pretty sure he was the only one
laughing at this one however.

Lullabies playing....babies being born,
people quietly and somberly waiting
for their loved ones to come out of surgery.
An older woman looks up,
hearing the lullaby she asks Mr. B:
Why do they keep playing that lullaby?
Mr. B responds:
They play that every time
a baby is born.
Haven't you heard,
they play
Another One Bites the Dust
when they lose one too!
That was the end of ANY
waiting room conversation for Mr. B.
[poor woman, looked down with disgust.]

He's a Keeper!





Last Laugh!
On the day to check out the Doctor
came in and said,
"well, i have never seen this before!"
He continued, "I have never seen
a patient
write 'for now' after
their spouses declaration of
husband/wife!"


Me:
Well, I like to keep my options open!
He was bugging me in pre-op,
I figured we would see how recovery went!!!
Dr.: And????
Me:
I think I will KEEP him.
He's a KEEPER!
Love you Mr. B!

1 comment:

Heatherlyn said...

You guys are funny! You sound perfect for each other!!! That's a good thing! :)

on marriage

'Will you, um, marry me?' I haven't seen you in weeks! You don't look happy or excited about the prospect of our marriage! You're asking me to give up my - my freedom, my joie de vivre for an institution that fails as often as it succeeds? And why should I marry you anyway? I mean, why do you wanna marry me? Besides some bourgeois desire to fulfill an ideal that society embeds in us from an early age to promote a consumer capitalist agenda?