i am NOT a morning person

i am not a morning person*.

*unless i am fishing

or have a camera

and

a perfectly painted sky

first to admit that i am a lousy cranky mess most mornings.

even the word morning...sounds like mourning....therefore it is grief to me. i have to wake up on my own, or at least be allowed to believe that i woke up on my own, even if such waking was nudged a little by someone poking me until i began to stir. at that point....let me be to stretch, yawn, and awaken. then i am bliss. i don't mind the sun shining in.

[heaven forbid i wake up to darkness,

that might warrant

wearing a caution sign

around my neck!]

this morning Mr. B cheerfully brings me prune juice. 6:30 am and he feels it necessary to be the bearer of bad fruit.

Seriously. so i am up.


...and i react. i make the bed, angerly.

i head into the bathroom and brush my teeth....which mistake i will pay for later....drinking prune juice is bad enough, drinking it with morning breath is better than a fresh palate expecting something delectable.

prune juice is NOT delectable.

and so I am grumpy,

and i have spent the morning pouting and reacting.

choosing an attitude

that
perpetuates

only

my own misery.

could i have just thanked him?

could i have just fallen back to slumber after smiling peacefully up at my best friend and BEST advocate for my health?

i mean really,

he was just doing what he feels is

best for my healing and my health.

he loves me....loves me not is NOT an option.

really....so now I regret.

i got up.

i asked him in about 12 different ways why he was so bent on me being awake.

did he need something?

did he just want me to stay in the habit of waking early?

was he upset that i was still lounging while he was making the lunches?

is my healing taking to long....?

finally he just looked at me,

took the glass of prune juice and drank it himself.

he wasn't trying to torture me.

he was just trying to be nice.

to make sure i had something beside my bed

when i woke up

something healthy

because he loves me

and for some weird reason

he wants to wake up next to me

for many many more mornings

mornings.....i may hate them....

but i hate WORSE

the thought of him waking up without me,

or me without him.

and so i poured myself another glass of prune juice,

drank it

and hugged him,

before heading back to bed.

GOOD morning????

yep, i suppose it was.