Ahhh yes. He makes me wait for a first kiss. That one moment when you know that the person you are holding makes your heart beat swiftly, and your knees quiver. That moment when your soul decides that this person IS the other half of you; making you one whole complete person.
That moment when you put all the pieces of the puzzle in your heart together and find that the picture is perfect. It only lasts a moment, but in that one moment you know. You know that this person is the other half of your whole being. This person is the one cupid made just for you.
I had kissed a lot of boys, A LOT!!! And I knew.
That date, Mr. B seemed more nervous than usual. He was bringing me home earlier than usual. I don't really even remember where we went, those details are not as important as that first kiss.
B pulled behind the elementary school. Parked the car, and asked me to dance. Weird, I thought. Okay. So next to the yellow mustang he took me in his arms, some 80's music in the background and we danced.
It was in that moment that I first felt his heart beating against mine, almost in sync with my own. Our breathing was too like a dance. And it was also that very moment that I noticed how SHORT I am next to him.
But in that moment I realized that I am his perfect match. I fit right under his arm, as if I were made for him and he for me. He leaned, my knees shook, I looked up and felt his breath, took in a whiff of his after shave, and his lips were against mine. Softly he kissed me, and suddenly my whole life made sense. The good, the bad, the uneasy and even the sad moments. I had lived through it all to get to that moment. And I knew. This IS the boy I want to spend the rest of my moments with.
'Will you, um, marry me?' I haven't seen you in weeks! You don't look happy or excited about the prospect of our marriage! You're asking me to give up my - my freedom, my joie de vivre for an institution that fails as often as it succeeds? And why should I marry you anyway? I mean, why do you wanna marry me? Besides some bourgeois desire to fulfill an ideal that society embeds in us from an early age to promote a consumer capitalist agenda?